Peace...see title at end (surprise!)
I'm going to try to write tonight, and then title and put a catchy photo in the blog (yes, I try to have the photos "catchy").Ever think about what if's? I understand on some level that living with regret is futile, as we can't change what we did or didn't do in past, but when I'm running (mostly) or cannot sleep, I think sometimes what would my life be like if I had done the things I was too afraid to lacked confidence to do as a child. What, if anything, would be different today?Things I regret I didn't do in life...
- Back pack around Europe. Kind of hard to do with kids in grade school or a mortgage. Advice to recent college grads, if opportunity presents, a must do! Would I have some fabulous experiences to tell my kids about now that involved staying in a hostel or trying to survive on less than $5 (or Euros) a day? Now, far too set in my ways, staying in an economy hotel let alone a youth hostel is a stretch out of my comfort zone. Back packing around Europe days might've come/gone for me.....
- Join the Peace Corps. I did volunteer in New Mexico with an order of nuns post college (not to BE a nun, mind you), but ended my time there too soon. I sometimes wonder, what if I had gone to Madagascar or Sierra Leon like I had originally planned, would it have been more difficult for me to leave and what impact would that have had in my life? At my college reunion, I talked with a fellow grad who spent all of her post college years in Africa or Asia, mostly in the Peace Corps. I am still fascinated and wonder why I never followed through?
- I never died my hair pink. or purple. or blue. Yes, I wanted to when I was about 15, but I attended Catholic school and they frowned upon. Not sure I could pull off as a 42-year-old clinical social worker with 2 children in suburbia.
- I didn't push myself harder in high school and college. It took me years to figure out I really am fairly smart, would've been nice to have more options earlier in life. Or may be not.
Things I regret I did do in my life......
- Got a tattoo. Yes. There. Ooh...most probably don't know I have one but yes, it's a silly little tattoo that is terribly faded. While I don't judge others who choose to have tattoos, the person I was at 21 and the person I am at 42 are in stark contrast to one another in many ways and I'm not sure I connect with the tattoo that cohabitates on my body. Wondering if I should have it redone to symbolize my life "now", or if I should start the painful process of trying to get it removed.
- Trusted people who were not worthy of my trust, and befriended people who were not worthy of my friendship. One of my favorite quotes reads "do not overvalue those who undervalue you." Author unknown, to me. In practice, I work with clients often on this same issue..... I'm only beginning to understand it myself.
- Drank way too much Diet Dr. Pepper. My dentist will love this. My teeth aren't happy that I drank it in lieu of water for so many years, nor is my checking account or insurance company.
Things I'm happy I didn't do in life.....
- Buy a mini van. Yes, I know they're wonderful for families. Yes, Yes, I get it. But as a person who has, personally, not wanted to be pigeonholed into the traditional "soccer mom" image, I can now with certainty state that I've never nor will I ever own a mini van. Please, my mini van loving mom friends, do not send me hate mail. My best friend Erin can defend me when I say that this has been a long time love-hate relationship with the concept for me. (Ps. She teased me incessantly for wanting one and then ended up driving one into the ground for years....)
- Wear leg warmers. As a person with "athletic calves"...there is no reason I need to add width to my calves.
- Have documentation on phones, video, text, Facebook, instagram, or twitter of my college years. Just saying.....
Things I'm thankful I did do in my life.....
- Had 2 really great boys. I'm certain I have more grey hair because of them, but that's why I go to see Jenny (my hairstylist) every month! Shh....
- Decided to start running. That could almost be #1 in my life, but really, what kind of mom would I be if I said that first?
- Decided to get a dog. The daughter I never had. What took me so long to get her?
- Decided to get my Master's degree. For all the opportunities it's offered me in my life, I'm thankful I decided to go back to school and will never regret getting more education.
- Decided to start writing again. Thank you to all those who have inspired me to write.
So may be tonight is titled "Peace....in accepting the things I regret that I did and didn't do life"......Quote I love "I'd rather regret the things I've done, then regret the things I haven't done" Lucille Ball.(Love this quote. Life is finite. What if tomorrow never comes and my hair never is 'pink'? Tragic!)Peace and Happy addition to the blog process this week......