What does a month devoted to gratitude do to a person?

Each November, for the past several years, I have devoted the month to posting daily all at least one entry on gratitude.  I am happy I have inspired others to do the same.  What started as a small little reminder for myself has turned into this November Gratitude Practice that has been the perfect backdrop to start my holiday season.It's hard, sometimes, however....To practice anything daily, truly.  While I aspire to meditate, practice yoga, juice, and write, "life" and all the expectations that each of us has upon us becomes a distraction and a struggle to balance sometimes what we would like to do, and what we must.  The lines can be blurry.How do we decipher what is something we would like to do, or something we must do?  How do we determine if this is something we truly want to do, or something others are placing upon us?What feeds our soul?  What helps us to feel more whole, furthering our life journey in a positive space?  Are all of our "should do's" something that we really "should do" or simply someone else's expectations of what he/she thinks we ought to be doing with our life? Wanting with our life?I can say with absolute certainty, the practice of gratitude is a gift.  When I am the most at peace in my life, I am focused on all that I have vs all that I think I should have. With the inundation from advertising on TV, or in magazines or on social media, it can be a struggle to focused on gratitude for what we do have in our life.

I spent the last 3-4 years of my 93-year-old grandmother in law's life, driving her around on Thursdays from place to place as she could no longer drive.  We would chat about current events, politics, my children, faith, and life.  In the last year, I felt almost compelled to ask her to tell me stories about her childhood, her life during the Depression, and her marriage and raising of children.  She had a very simple life.  She never wore glamorous ball gowns, or traveled to exotic locations, or ate at fancy restaurants.  Yet, she was so thankful for the simple pleasures in life....homemade cookies, standard coffee with cream, and handwritten cards or drawings from kids.  Every holiday, one would think I had made the most spectacular meal or had the fanciest of decorations as she was always, always, always so thankful and complimentary for my efforts.  Almost overly so.   I cherished every moment I had with her, and felt like it was in some way God's reminder to me to be grateful for all that I have, instead of yearning for what I think I should want based on other's lives.  She never once said to me "I wish I had more in my life"....rather she expressed such gratitude, always with me.  A woman who grew up in the Depression.  With so little.  Was yet so grateful.  

"I am grateful for what I am and have. My thanksgiving is perpetual."

Henry David Thoreau

 One of the greatest compliments I have ever been given is the observation of my grateful spirit.  I remember when this first came up in a discussion, I felt both humbled and embarrassed.  Very opposing emotions..... humbled because I really do feel grateful for all that I have in my life....like Grandma. Yet  embarrassed as it seemed almost to be (although I am quite sure not intended to be) a reminder of how my sense of gratitude and at times aversion to the over-emphasis of consumerism and worldly goods that others covet somehow separates me from my peers.  It is not said in judgment, rather observation that my peace does not come in things, and the secret is...... nor does anyone else's.....

I remember hearing a story years ago of a man who was obsessed with all things shiny and new and gadgets and trinkets and baubles and.....always yearning for more.  Never satisfied with what he had, and always, always wanting more.  Depressed....he went to talk to his closest confidant, he was instructed to gather all that he had, place all his most valued possessions on his bed and surround himself with his "things."  As you could imagine, his bed was covered from side to side, and up to the ceiling with his "things", hardly leaving a space for him.  He stood looking at all that he had, crawled into the bed with his "things" and was asked to think about how he felt being surrounded by all that he deemed as valuable.  A mountain of "things" surrounded him.  Embarrassed, he realized he felt nothing.....for he finally realized although he had amassed a mountain of "things" in his life, not one or all of them could truly do anything to bring him happiness..... for without a grateful spirit, we can never be truly happy.........

Naturally having at grateful spirit, and knowing these real life and "stories".... I admit it is still challenging to truly live a life of gratitude.  Over the past few months I feel like I have been tested.  I have been reminded of some of the worldly things that others have, that I currently don't and may never have.  I have learned of people who choose to not be in my life, for reasons I understand and some I don't.  And for a moment..... Ok, sometimes more than a moment.... I am just like anyone else set back into a place of wanting more.  Yet the moment I move into that space, I can feel myself, my true authentic self, slipping away and being replaced by someone I not only don't know, but someone I truly don't want to know.

So what to do?  What to do?  what to do?

This holiday season....start simply with....

• Continuing (or stating) the practice of acknowledging at least one thing/person/etc for which you are grateful for each day.
• Seek out ways to give of yourself in small or large ways in your community.
• Make a "blessings bag" (filled with snacks, hats, gloves, toiletries) to give to those in need on your day-to-day travels.
• When making a "wish" list, be humble.  Consumerism will never bring you joy!
• Volunteer.  At local soup kitchen.  In your faith community.  At your children's school.  At your local animal shelter.  Give.
• Invite neighbors/friends over for the holidays if they have no where else to go.  Open your heart, and your home.
• Ask yourself how having "said item" will truly make you happy.  Are you sure it will?  Or are you buying into the marketing genius of another?

 While I am so happy that I started this practice years ago, this year I was really challenged and reminded it is not an exercise just for November.... in order to truly have it be life changing, and to find a place of peace and joy....we must remember to practice gratitude daily.  No matter what is going on around us, let our hearts be filled with love and gratitude.

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."

John F. Kennedy

Peace.........