marathon runnner moonlighting as a yogi
"Have patience with everything that remains unresolved in your heart....Live in the question." Rainer Maria RilkeOne of the best parts of running for me is the opportunity to be still in my thoughts and find my center. To be grounded to the earth. To spend time selfishly processing whatever leftover thoughts remain from the day that encompasses a mostly other-centered practice in family and work life. I never regret the miles I do, and often regret the miles I don't. It isn't regret for not getting the mileage in per say (much to the chagrin of my running partners who are engineers and want to make sure we go EXACTLY the mileage we are scheduled to go), rather I regret the time to just be still in thought even if my body is not.So what am I doing spending so much time this month doing this thing called yoga? I feel like I'm cheating on my beloved "running"....Shhh. Don't tell "running."I NEVER thought I'd like yoga as much as I do. I have a hard time sitting still, hence running is good as it pushes me to be still in thought as my body is at work. So I'm as shocked as anyone that yoga is offering me similar benefits in both mind and body even though in practice they are so different.But are they really?When I trained for my first half marathon, I drove the distance shortly after I had committed to do the race but hadn't really started the training process. 13.1 miles is crazy long when you drive it in the car conscious that you will be running it. Imagine my terror when I then committed to running a full marathon (and no, I didn't purposely drive the distance that time....ha. ) and thought about how long it would take me to cover the miles on foot. I think it's difficult for most people who are not runners and hear you are running a marathon to understand this: completing the marathon, while an accomplishment, is only part of the story. Preparing for a marathon takes countless hours and hundreds of miles of running getting ready to run the actual race. It is the quiet moments alone with oneself, the stillness in thought, the perseverance that allows one to be ready to run the race.Yoga, for me, is so different from my experience with running yet so similar. Being able to accept the limitations of my body while pushing myself to do more than my mind really wants to be doing has been exceedingly challenging. In a race, there is a clear mark of the "winners" and all the rest of us who come in "after the winners" of the race. In yoga, it isn't so clear. For some, being able to do a headstand isn't all that difficult so perhaps their practice isn't as challenging as another who is just starting to get comfortable with inversions? I'm learning...the challenge, the practice, the measure is much more an internal process but so similar to the mental journey that running has for so many runners. Make sense?Sometimes when I'm on the mat, listening to the prophetic words of the instructors, I find myself giggling. Giggling. I know, is that appropriate? I wonder sometimes if I should share with the instructors why I'm giggling. It's almost as if some of them have been with me on my runs, yes, training for my marathons as the words their about finding peace, finding your center, finding focus, discipline, service....all of these are not only thoughts that go through my head while I'm running....they are also words I write about in my blog and the thoughts I have as I meditate and pray.So maybe "running" would be ok if he/she found out that I was moonlighting as a yogi?Whatever our method or instrument to find that inner peace, maybe it's not as important to how we get there, just as long as we continue on our path......"Peace requires us to surrender our illusions of control." Jack Kornfield. Letting go and practicing being in the moment.....for now, I'm enjoying yoga. Of course, I do need to start getting out running soon as the Berlin Marathon is roughly 7 1/2 months away and I'm pretty certain I can't "downward facing dog" my whole way through the 26.2 miles.....Peace.....