What does F-I-F-T-Y mean to me? Embracing the soon-to-be milestone birthday!
Age or more specifically AGING has never been a source of distress or grief for me. While I am not stressed or distressed rather by my fast-approaching milestone birthday, I do admit this one is hitting me a little strangely and making me pause for a few moments…..
How…Is this possible?
For over a decade, I was involved with and became a director for Gilda’s Club Metro Detroit (a free cancer support community for anyone affected by cancer, part of a larger support community Cancer Support Community). There, I learned in a very real and painful lesson: AGING is a luxury afforded to few. This message has shaped my perception on aging, and although fleeting at times has served as a reminder to seize the day. Carpe Diem!
As I transitioned into 30 and then into 40, I continued to maintain this mindset, focusing as much as I could on the here and now and embracing opportunities and friendships without much effort or organized thought or intention. I’ve been blessed with friends decades older & decades younger than me, feeling chameleon-like with my ability to find commonality beyond the arbitrary nature of one’s age. I’ve traveled far and wide, allowing things and people and achievements to come to me rather than intentionally planning or seeking them out. The gift of being younger is the illusion of time…regardless of how much my chosen mindset had attempted to train me otherwise.
Then….COVID.
Over the past year I have spent so much time writing, and thinking (even more than before, which is to say a lot since I’ve been told more than one time in my life that I am in my head A LOT…and hard to read…but that’s another story) and wondering if I TRULY have been living my life as a testament to that mindset…. AGING- a luxury afforded to few.
As 50 FAST approaches….. I have realized I don’t want to passively just accept what is offered to me anymore, as that no longer serves me. Rather…. embracing this milestone has allowed me to shift my perspective and come up with a new plan! I will no longer be complacent with idly going with the current if it no longer serves me, understanding this shift in me will undoubtedly unnerve those around me who have benefited from my compliant and often passive demeanor.
What do milestones mean to you?
This is what turning 50 means to me.
F- FACING FEARS! Having the courage to do things that scare me. No longer allowing my fears to prevent me from chasing proverbial stars in my life. If I have one day more or a million…I am committed to facing my fears and following my dreams. Writing and publishing my first book. Submitting applications for Survivor until they have no choice but to cast me on the next season. Climb Mt. Kilimanjaro. Exploring…… I don’t want to take a moment for granted and not push myself to face my fears. What would you do if you were ready to face your fears?
I- INSPIRATION! I’m exhausted over this past year, with the endless news cycle, toxic political environment, and constant reminders of all we have lost through COVID. But I also know there continues to be beauty, and light and love out in the world. May this next chapter of life allow for more space for all of these to rise up. I commit to not only finding inspiration in the world, but consciously living my life as an inspiration for someone who may also need it to get to the next day……. Where do you find inspiration?
F-FRIENDS/FAMILY! With all that has been lost over the past year, what has really been illunimated for me is the power of TRUE friendships and family. I’m acknowledge I took them for grated, assuming they’d always be there. And those who mattered, were/are. They have consistently and lovingly showed up for me when I needed them most. I commit to showing up for them, and being a reminder of my depth of gratitude and belief we humans are meant to journey through life together. Space and Time is powerless to the forces of love and friendship. Have you ever missed the opportunity to tell someone how much he/she meant to you, only learning it was too late? Never…miss an opportunity.
T- TALENTS! I love writing, love being a storyteller, and love baking. Maybe that’s enough? Why do I need to seek to be more than I am, rather than embrace the talents I have been given and allow space for them to grow? If these never bring one fame or fortune, can they still be enough? Can there still be purpose and meaning in doing them anyway? What talents have you been given, and how much time/energy/effort/space do you dedicate to allow for these to grow? Maybe at some point we learn to embrace what and who we are, rather than wishing for something/someone that was never meant to be…. and may be that “point” is the transition to 50?
Y-YES! My beginning of my YES decade. Publish my book? Yes! Climb Mt. Killimanjaro, yes??? Get more tattoos…. get more piercings….die my hair whatever color I want…. run more, bake more, cook more, meet for tea/coffee/drinks/walks more…. concerts/plays/travel/learn/explore…. CELEBRATE every opportunity for whatever even little thing/event that shows up in life. A RESOUNDING YES to it all!
Tomorrow is promised to none of us. I learned but “forgot” this for a few moments (or years)…. and as the next milestone appraoches, what I truly wish for is the mindset of “AGING- a luxury afforded to few” to remain close to my heart and omnipresent in my mind. Let it move me to embrace more that nourishes me, and release more that keeps me small or stuck in my limiting beliefs. Let me remember I need no one’s permission to live my life the way I know is inherently right for me, and with that comes a great responsivbility as it is also a reminder it all depends on me! Happiness…Peace….Love….Light….. rests in each of our hands.
50. This is what I want this milestone to mean to me. One more day, or a million….I will remember this….
“Oh God, to reach the point of death, only to realize one has not lived at all.”
Henry David Thoreau
This….. This will NOT be me.
Who’s joining me on this next chapter of my journey?
Wishing you peace, love and light….now and forever…..
